Writing a “Dear John” letter can be hard. That’s why we made this easy to use form. It makes dumping your boyfriend fun! So invite your girlfriends over this Friday night and write up that perfect Dear John.
Instructions: Complete the form (preferably with a pink or glittery pen) and then mail it. And don’t forget to include the proper postage, you’d hate to keep your Elder waiting!
Dear Elder ____________,
Hi, (circle one)
I need to tell you something important.
I am sorry but I think it’s time we end our relationship.
it’s over, so over.
I think it’s time to end things because (circle all that apply)
I want you to focus on your mission.
I want to date all the really great returned missionaries in my ward.
I am getting married to a really handsome and smart guy I met last week.
I got married four months ago — and I am expecting!
I woke up this morning and realized, you’re the last person I could ever be married to.
Don’t be too upset, (circle your condolences)
maybe things will work out between us when you get home.
it’s not you, it’s me that has the problem.
just think of all those other girls that will be so flippin lucky to date you.
you know I hate it when you cry.
I am so glad you understand. Well, have a nice (circle all that apply)
life, you creep.
P.S. No, I am not joking.